Mother’s Day 2023
I don’t have any pictures of Mother’s Day last year. I had hurt my neck that week, had only just found out what I’d actually done to it, and was in immense pain. It was the beginning of my sleepless nights, maxing my luck out at just 2-3 hours of sleep each night. I was at the point where I still assumed I’d be okay in just a few days, not still working on fixing myself a full year later.
I sent the kids off to have fun at church with Grammy and papa last year, and then sat at Scheels drinking a chai with Ben, trying to sooth my neck with weird arm movements that I hoped no one would notice. It wasn’t the first really rough Mother’s Day I’ve ever had (rewind to Ben’s knee injury that almost led to an amputation many years ago), but it was certainly sucky.
This year, I appreciated Mother’s Day all the more. I tended to the littlest’s midnight nightmare without being grumpy, hiked with the fam in the morning, and got a chai at scheels-this time with everyone in tow, and without pain.
When I think of this injury, much of its affects were on my physical life. My inability to do Jiu Jitsu at all for a while. My issue, still, to complete what should be simple movements in Jiu Jitsu, but that are instead marred by my inability to utilize my body as I expect. Physical pain, physical recovery, physical changes.
Today, however, reminds me of the affect it had on my family life, too. I wasn’t able to help my kids with basic tasks, or stay upright to do basic school tasks with them. Everything was SO hard and SO frustrating. Here we are, a year later, still their mom. Still loving them with everything inside me. Still wanting the best for them. So grateful for their grace through a time where I was not quite me and couldn’t be there for them in the same way as always. The injury sucked, and not getting to celebrate Mother’s Day with them last year extra sucked, but it only made this year all the better. Mother’s Day was infinitely more appreciated today.
Here’s to another year mom-ing, another year of healing, and another year of Jiu Jitsu.
